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A Message From The Deputy Headmaster
Issue 1384
nick.jpg As you will know, the Sixth Form Debating Society has suggested a very, very important debate, which I am very keen to take part in, but unfortunately the cowardly...

(At this point, we had to cut Nick off in the interests of Freedom of Speech, ie the Headmaster’s freedom to carry on speaking…)


A Continued Message From the Headmaster

Hello again!

What Nick doesn’t understand about Freedom of Speech is that it includes the Freedom Not to Speak, so I will not be taking part in the Sixth Form Debate on the motion: "This House would like someone else to be Headmaster”.

Nick is very keen on this sort of juvenile point-scoring, imagining that he’s quite good at it (sorry, Nick, someone has to tell you), along with supply teacher Mr Miliband and fruitcake stallholder Mr Farage.

If we’re going to have a debate, it’s only fair that it should include absolutely everybody who wants to speak and if that means the podium’s too crowded to have a debate at all, let’s not have one. That’s how democracy works.

I know in the past I’ve been overheard talking about “Green crap”, but I really feel strongly that we should discuss Green crap along obviously with Scottish crap, Welsh crap or any other kind of crap on offer! (No offence)…

D.C.

To read more letters from the Headmaster (and of course, the Deputy Head), please buy the latest edition of Private Eye - or subscribe here and have the magazine delivered to your home every fortnight.

Next issue on sale:
3rd February 2015.
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For all these stories you can buy the magazine or subscribe here and get delivery direct to your home every fortnight.
Next issue on sale: 3rd February 2015.

Private Eye Issue 1383
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