The Totally Secure Prime Minister’s WhatsApp Group
Members Only, Issue 1647
Members Only, Issue 1647
Stay calm, everyone, everything’s under control.
Darren Jones
Why are you saying that? What’s gone wrong now?
Why are you saying that? What’s gone wrong now?
Morgan McSweeney
Everything’s going really well. The boss’s policy of doing nothing and saying nothing is working brilliantly. At the moment we’ve only been hit by 10% tariffs, which is a great result.
Everything’s going really well. The boss’s policy of doing nothing and saying nothing is working brilliantly. At the moment we’ve only been hit by 10% tariffs, which is a great result.
Rachel Reeves
Apart from on steel.
Apart from on steel.
Darren Jones
And cars.
And cars.
Morgan McSweeney
That’s a lot less than all the other countries.
That’s a lot less than all the other countries.
David Lammy
Except Russia.
Except Russia.
David Lammy
Russia is a country, isn’t it?
Russia is a country, isn’t it?
Peter Mandelson
Leave the Americans to me. Abide by the old trade-wartime slogan: Keep calm and carry on sucking up. And sucking up is something I’m rather good at. It’s in my blood, you might say.
Now, must fly. The sun will be setting over Mar-a-Lago and I might drop in for a bite.
Leave the Americans to me. Abide by the old trade-wartime slogan: Keep calm and carry on sucking up. And sucking up is something I’m rather good at. It’s in my blood, you might say.
Now, must fly. The sun will be setting over Mar-a-Lago and I might drop in for a bite.
Rachel Reeves
Are we really going to do nothing? These tariffs are turning my economic plans into a disaster.
Are we really going to do nothing? These tariffs are turning my economic plans into a disaster.
Angela Rayner
Yeah, without the tariffs, they’d have just been a catastrophe! No offence.
Yeah, without the tariffs, they’d have just been a catastrophe! No offence.
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Next issue on sale: 2nd May 2025
Next issue on sale: 2nd May 2025
